Sunday, May 6, 2012

Good Stuff

1. Yesterday I read this great article about racial bias, which I found via yes and yes. Lately my sister has been particularly concerned about some of the things my niece is learning from people we love but have fucked up attitudes to some things and people, and the article highlights why this kind of influence is so damaging. Also, it was good for me to be reminded that we all have programmed responses to things, sometimes responses that we are ashamed of. I worry that by confessing her feelings, the lady in the article might have believed herself to be pardoned; sometimes I do that with the bad things I think and then confess to Vincent, but I'm pretty sure that wasn't her intention. I like that she fights the impulse. We can't help what's been programmed into us, but we can do our darndest not to let those reflexes win.

2. We watched HOWL this week, which was very good. Near the end, Ginsberg says something that means a lot to me, especially in light of what I was saying recently about being relatively hyper-conscious of ethnicity and culture:

Homosexuality is a condition. And because it alienated me or set me apart from the beginning, it served as a catalyst for self-examination or detailed realisation of my environment, and the reasons why everyone else is different, and why I'm different.

I was certainly set apart from the beginning. I really like that to Ginsberg, everyone is different; I think we all are too. I also like how he says 'realisation' of his environment; it's been like a gradual epiphany for me, or series of epiphanies - maybe a bit like figuring out which bit of the matrix I'm seeing now is. But I've been really lucky to have had a person who believes the things I do, to make these realisations possible; people do it alone, but I need the reassurance that I'm not insane (what's that old story, where nearly everyone is mad, so the sane people are the crazy ones?).

3. Finally, on Thursday Vincent and I watched Cabaret, and it was MAGNIFICENT. If you haven't seen it, as I hadn't, get thee to the video shop and do yourself a solid. I laughed so much, and hearing Judy in Liza's voice and recognising Judy's limbs and eyes on Liza was like seeing an old friend. I suppose because it was. Anyway, here is one of my favourite songs from the film, which I can't wait to learn and force my firstborn to perform with me: Money.

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