Wednesday, October 5, 2011

A Quick Note

Since we've just come home from my beautiful little cousin's sixteenth birthday at my favourite restaurant in the universe (can it be a restaurant if it's open only once a week?), and having eaten half my body weight and then danced up a tornado (look out Detroit!) I am ready to co-llapse.

This is a song that's been on my mind a bit lately; I rarely listen to it because the slight melancholy in the happiness makes me feel really sick (a bit like lots of my favourite songs from the eighties - actually my favourite thing about eighties music in general). My lovely friend included it in the mix cd she made me as a wedding present two years ago (is there a greater show of love than making someone a playlist? I don't often do them now but I used to love doing them for my favourite people, like secret audio love letters... sometimes not so secret when they'd get to the end and find songs like Truly tacked on), and I used to listen to it most mornings and lots of evenings when I was waiting for Vincent to come back and marry me. My days were so fraught, and I felt so adrift and worried that something might happen to stop us from doing it, so that on top of how the song actually sounds (or possibly in place of it), it sounds to me like uncertainty and the threat of the unknown. Which is what being in love is, I suppose. There's not a day that goes by that I don't worry about something separating Vincent and me, and even in our happiest times (which are every time we're together) I'm aware it's not guaranteed to be forever. Maybe that's why what Tusi Tamasese said about death not breaking these bonds meant so much to me.

Anyway, it's a great song, and I hope you enjoy it and can make some happy associations with your not-crazy brain. I should be so lucky...

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