This morning, I had a fall. I didn't fall; I slipped, my feet shot out from under me, and I had a fall. Even Vincent said so when he called my boss to explain why I would be late (I called back later to say I wouldn't be in at all, after becoming a bit hysterical and realising I couldn't even walk comfortably). When it happened, and I was prostrate on the deck, calling for Vincent and unsure if I could get up or if I'd be able to walk ("walk again" was actually my first reaction), I had a flash of the old woman in the ad for those St John personal alarms, lying on her kitchen floor with her broken hip. Pain aside, I felt humiliated and Old.
I've been noticing, more and more, that my recall is slower than it was. A couple of weeks ago I tried on my friend's glasses and all of a sudden, I could see. One or two beers now gives me a headache, and if I do more than that (avoiding the immediate reaction) the next day I'm likely to be incapacitated, or at least in a good deal of pain.
When did this happen? Only a little while ago, I was mid-twenties; young, healthy, and able to drink like a very thirsty fish. In two and a half weeks I will be twenty-eight: late twenties, and all of a sudden I am blind, have no memory, and can't drink without getting a sore gut. It's confronting. I knew this would happen eventually, but now? Is it because I gave up sudoku, and only exercise if there's beer in it for me? Is it all the lollies? Thirty was supposed to be the height of my powers. What is it going to be now? The day I finally get an ear-trumpet?
Late twenties: not what you expect. Seize the day, my young friends.